Don’t ask me for a flat white

One big down side of being a runner again, is that I’m back to making coffee. I remember after getting my first “proper” job as an After Effects artist, feeling like Rachel in Friends when she quit Central Perk saying, “you have no idea how good it feels to say that as of this moment I will never make coffee again!”.

Screen shot 2014-03-21 at 23.39.43

Now, a year later, I am eating my words like she did in the next scene, where her new supervisor at the dream company is explaining how the boss likes his coffee…

Screen shot 2014-03-21 at 23.53.21

Anyway. I don’t mind making them, cappuccinos, lattes, americanos… but I don’t do flat whites. Why? because it’s not a thing. A cappuccino is a shot of coffee, with a bit of milk and a lot of foam. A latte is a shot of coffee with a lot of milk and a bit of foam. Fine. A flat white, is a shot of coffee with a lot of milk and a bit of foam, for pretentious coffee drinkers (see diagram bellow). A very good marketing firm somewhere invented it for people who like to think they know about coffee. Can’t see the difference with a latte? Right, that’ll be because there isn’t one. Oh no wait, the flat white is served in a cup 5% smaller. I forgot how much difference that makes to the taste…

flat white 02

Basically it’s all coffee and milk. Yes, I said it.

You can ask me for a flat white, but it won’t come with a smile.

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